Monday, October 19, 2009

Ready-Made Man

Who wants a ready-made man? Ok, who doesn’t? I spent time last weekend with a sweet young woman who recently became my friend, and as we shared our dreams and plans for the future, she told me she has no intention of working for anybody, and preferred to own a big shop instead. I thought it was a lovely idea, and even though I wondered how much she would make from that, I didn’t say anything because I’m not business oriented and there is a lot I don’t know.

But as she began to paint a picture of the shop, of its little room with two couches, a lovely rug, a TV set, a microwave (for the kids’ lunches) etcetera, I started to wonder where she would get the capital to start off in such a big way. Then, as if reading my mind she turned and said, “I have to marry a rich man oh!” Aha.

We spent the next two hours talking about our opinions, which turned out to be as different as night and day. It’s not like I want to marry a poor man, or that I mind a man who has money, but I don’t believe a man’s material possessions or lack thereof should be such a big issue in determining whether I’ll marry him or not. In the end we agreed to disagree. But in spite of that, I went away with some questions.

1) Is it wrong to want to marry a man who has (in her words) “made his money waaaay before he met you”?
2) Is it acceptable to say, “I am not ready to suffer with or for any man, they are not worth it?”
3) Does the fact that a guy doesn’t have a car mean that he is not ready to marry? (“How would we move around?" , she asked innocently)
4) How many of us are prepared to live without a Generator, deep freezer or microwave? How many of us even know how? (Do you know how to use firewood properly or how to smoke fish for preservation? Lol, half kidding!)
5) Are we talking about money and who pays for what in our relationships and courtships, or are we waiting to get married and be unpleasantly surprised that what you think is not what he thinks?

Answers anyone?

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